My child would never

If you are a parent who has brought up teenagers you may be able to relate?

I remember before my eldest (Carmen) turned 13, bragging about how sensible she is and how she would be the model teenager.

Haaa, ha, ha ha ha ha.

I definitely had a shitload of delusional stuck up my ass.

I think it is harder for the eldest because everything they do, they do first and it shocks the hell out of  their parents.

When Carmen French kissed a boy, I grounded her.  My excuse was because she had lied about it but the truth is I was in completely freaked out by the fact that my little girl was French kissing.

Carmen seemed to go overnight from being a very proper, overly mature child to being a complete hooligan.

She did just about all the things that a parent hopes their teen will never do. She also unfortunately inherited my terrible temper.

Things that really set of her very easily pushable buttons at the time:

• “You say you want to be a writer, but you cannot think of anything more expressive to say than ‘Fuck you’”
• “You say that you are going to live of the land and give up all worldly goods, what about books?  They chop down a lot of trees for books you know.”
• “You look like every other teenager at the mall.”
• “You say you are not a Barbie but you take two hours to do your hair and make up”

She draped herself in black (because she was different) and holed herself up in her room, we renamed her “Resident Evil”.

History definitely repeats itself I dressed almost identically at the same age and thought I was so unique.

A few months before she turned 18, a beautiful butterfly emerged out of the black cocoon.  She ditched the 

Wednesday look and had to endure oddly coloured hair while the black grew out.

She is so intelligent, compassionate, beautiful, funny and talented.

Carmen turns 21 this month!!!!

PS: Jason, thanks for being there for Carmen when she needed it the most.