Shhh don't mention it

What do most men talk about when they are tipsy?

If I did a survey, I think the answer would be sex and sports.

But mad physicist AKA my husband, Michael talks about, The chaos theory, dark matter, bending time, space elevators (he was saying that must be possible back in 2003, before anybody else was saying that it may be).

Last night I was writing a story so I was flat out ignoring him.  This did not stop him, he simply pretended that I was listening and continued talking and explaining. He kept holding up two objects then knocking the one over with the other then he would take a pen and let if fall over from it's tip and sometimes it would knock the other two objects over and sometimes not.  This was very significant because something, something, blah, blah, blah, I was not listening so I can't tell you but it makes random possible now.

He is very excited about his new theory. He used to maintain that random was not possible now he thinks everything is completely random because of some or other chaos theory.  A couple of years ago I banned anybody from talking about “random” when Michael was around because it would result in him speaking about it for hours and having debates with anybody and everybody.  He got over himself and “random” became safe to mention in our house.  Now that he has looked into this chaos theory I am afraid that “random” is once again a banned topic in our household. Friends and family coming to Carmen’s 21^st take note, pass the word around, DO NOT MENTION “RANDOM”. 

Michael is now completely freaked out because he has discovered with this new theory that the world is completely chaotic and unstable.  I am no physicist but I knew that.  What I do like is when he talks about dark matter because he says we are mostly dark matter so we are made up of practically nothing. 

Why do I like that?

Because if most of me is dark matter, then in reality I am skinny.