I can never be the ring bearer

Michael and I decided to have a Lord of the Rings movie marathon this weekend.  We are watching Fellowship of the ring the part where they are on top of the mountain before going through the dwarf mine.

Michael:

Imagine he can't find the ring now.

Me:

 I totally could not be the ring bearer

Michael:

No you would have lost it in the first scene.  I can just see you digging in your hand bag, rummaging through your pockets looking at your neck chain mumbling.  "I know I had it, I am sure it is here somewhere."  Then after an hour of looking you will say, "Aaah maybe when we sat on that rock at the bottom of the mountain. I think I might of dropped it when I drank water."  (At this point he was on a roll and thought he was very funny) Then when you find it you will carry on through all kinds of danger and half the good people with you will be killed and as you are standing in Mordor about to drop the ring.  NO RING. The whole world would turn to dark sludge because of you.

Hang on Fellowship I know it was in here somewhere.

My family marvel at my ability to loose things.  I will walk out of the kitchen with the car keys in my hand by the time I reach the car three metres from the kitchen the keys will have vanished.  What usually follows is that we search for hours and are very late.

They always turn up in the strangest freaking places.  Our car keys have a magnet attached to them.  Once I spent hours looking for them at the office and they were under the keyboard all the time.  Every time I picked up the keyboard I did not see them because they were attached to the metal strip below the keyboard.

I usually discover that the bank card is missing when a trolley full of groceries has been rung up in the supermarket.

I even managed to lose Cleo our Chihuahua in the house when she was a tiny puppy.  (A mountain of laundry had fallen on top of her.)