Jess and I were already down about the fact that we felt our privacy had been infringed on when Jess got messages that a school friend of hers committed suicide. A 17 year old :-( I thought of his parents and close family and I cannot comprehend how they are feeling.
I spent a lot of time thinking yesterday about my blog and about my privacy. Since moving my new address has never appeared on any sites. We are moving in a few months again. What will these people learn from my blog? That we are a happy family with our own ups and downs. I don't think that that is such a bad thing. I have decided to carry on. Thank you for all the friends that comforted me yesterday when I was feeling down.
I am thinking with a lot of love of all the teenagers today at Jess school being sad about the loss of their friend. Please, please, please talk to somebody. My own personal little motto that has helped me through very hard times is: "The Sun always shines again tomorrow." I know it might not. I know our planet could disintegrate today. The thought is that there is always a possibility. I think I am possibly too curious to ever commit suicide. When I am really down and out, I am already assessing how I am going to get out of the situation. That is me personally but that is very different from depression. People that suffer from depression do not see an outcome and if you see somebody that you love is suffering get them to a doctor.
It may be dull and grey today but I have my happy back. Tomorrow my daughters arrive! We are going to have a gangsta 21st party! I am going to see so many of my bestest most loved people.
I started cheering up last night when my Mom phoned me:
"We need directions."
" Mom, tell Mandy to take the Pretoria Highway even though there are toll gates it is better the Benoni one is horrible at the moment."
"Then after the highway?"
Then I go on to give these long elaborate directions. Until I come to a realisation.
"Doesn't Vernon (my brother) have a GPS? Can't he loan it to Mandy (my niece, my Mom is coming up with her.)?"
"Mandy has got one as well, but I don't know if those things work."
Thanks Mom for giving me a good laugh I needed it.
THIS IS CARMEN'S WEEKEND!!!!!
|Carmen and Astrid|