Thursday, September 6, 2012
Think happy thoughts
From a distance all I can do is chat online and lend an ear.
I know that the more negative you are the worse it gets but what do you do to help lift somebody out of it when they are stuck in that moment?
Depression is cruel enough if you have money but if you are living from pay cheque to pay cheque it is so much worse.
She cannot go and see a psychologist or get medication. Try telling an employer that you need time off because you are suffering from depression.
I know from personal experience all you can do is drag yourself out of bed day after day and keep trying.
Fortunately I have found joy again and I no longer feel as if my life is like the inside of a dark cave.
What happened years ago is something I will never publicly write about but it took me years to heal. I only hope that this friend will find the strength from within and find the wonderful friends along the way in the same way that I did.
Three things helped me survive the hard years:
1. My daughters I knew that they needed me.
2. I was a single Mom with two little girls and battling to make it through each month, I would go and visit my parents once a month for the weekend. I would bawl all weekend telling my Mom how miserable my life was. I was horrified when my Mom told me that she loved me but she did not like me very much because I had become incredibly sorry for myself. How could she say that? Did she not see how shitty my life was? I grabbed my daughters and drove home early because I was so angry with my Mother. Then I started thinking and I realised that what my Mom had said was true. I had forgotten about all the good things in my life. I had two beautiful toddlers and a Mother who cared enough to help me with so many things to ease the burden and yet I had spent months bemoaning my life.
3. About 12 years ago, I again was a single Mom but this time with three daughters and very shell shocked after traumatic events. I went to a work seminar on positive affirmations. I have come to realise that thinking positively really does effect my life in a big way. Even if bad things happen and keep happening the way you perceive things can make you so much happier.
Perhaps it sounds cheesy but I try to focus on the happy things. When I am blue looking at fun family photos and videos really does cheer me up. Yes I do have sorry for myself moments, I am human, but I get over myself a lot quicker these days.