Why I should have eaten my children when they were babies.

There is an expression, “When they are small you want to eat them, when they are teenagers, you wish that you had.”

I spend a lot of time on my laptop working, playing and chatting to friends.  I am an addict I admit it but I don’t want to be cured.  Even before I had a computer I never listened to anybody, it is just the way that I am and I get so engrossed with what I am doing on my PC that I don’t have an idea about what is happening around me. 

The children use this against me because while I am concentrating on whatever I am doing on my laptop I will agree to anything.  On a Friday night I will be told “Ok I am getting ready now what time are you taking me?”  When I ask, “Where?” they answer with a very indignant “BUT YOU SAID, YES”

If they do anything really bad it is the same story:

·         But you said yes, when I asked if I could experiment with drugs.

·         But you said yes, when I asked if I could get the job doing exotic dancing.

·         But you said yes, when I asked if I could get a tattoo that covers my face.

Ok it is not as bad and I have decided to stop with those or they might really get ideas.  I am going to retrain my brain from now on when I am not listening I am going to say “NO” to everything.

Jason (Carmen’s boyfriend) a couple of months decided to put my observation skills to the test while I am on my laptop.  He decided to flash me with a brown eye.  Much to my families mirth I did not notice at all.  They still tease me about it and nobody seems to be in the least bit perturbed when I point out it might have been a bit wrong for him to flash his bum at me and had I seen it I would have needed therapy so my lack of observation skills is a good thing.