Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Our outing to the hospital

Jess has an enlarged spleen which and we have been back and forth to the hospital but in true Jessie style she has the doctors baffled.   Today we went back for the results of her blood tests.  We don’t have medical aid so we have been going to Helen Joseph and I know many of my friends would have nightmares at the thought but it is not as bad as you would expect.
One thing you get plenty of at Helen Joseph is queuing.  Fortunately there are plenty of seats so you don’t stand and get tired but it is rather like musical chairs except that when your chair gets taken you are winning. 

So the last time we were there they were out of blue cards.  What is a blue card?  Well it is a card that is blue and has your file number and stuff in and it is apparently near world end if you don’t have one.  Fortunately the clerk allowed me to put Jess’ details on a piece of paper. 
Then we sat
And waited
And waited
And sat
And waited
And waited
The sun set and rose again (ok not true but an hour passed).
Clerk at the window calls me over.   I am very excited at the activity and I run over to her.  Sadly it is bad news and she has lost the paper with our details so I write them again and we wait and wait. 
Jess and I grow long beards (true story)
While we are sitting there bored to destruction (no not distraction) Jess nudges me and whispers, “Mom the baby won’t stop looking at me”
Me, “I know it is creeping me out.”
Jess pointing to a cute cherub, “Mom the baby????”
Me, “Oh no, I thought you said the beggar.” (nodding my head towards the semi drunk looking beggar that was leering at Jess)
Clerk at the window calls me over.  I run.  Sadly bad news again apparently Jess’ file is nowhere to be found but she is speaking to her superiors and they will see what can be done.
Our beards turn snow white (true story.)  But, for those of you that don’t believe this true story I saw Merlin.  He had long straight white hair and a straight white beard.  I kept whispering to Jess to take a picture of him so that we would have proof of having seen a wizard but she seems to have a problem with taking pictures of strangers.  I think it is a teenage thing.
Clerk at window calls me over.  Apparently she is a bit worried that I may be a bit cuckoo, no idea what gave her that impression but she asks me if I am sure that I brought my daughter to this hospital before and that she was admitted before, as they cannot find any trace of her.  After assuring her of my sanity and that Jess was there before I tell her that perhaps they spelled Jess’ surname wrong.  Our surname is Pitschlitz people %$##@@ it up all the time.  I get mail that refers to me as Ms Titschlitz all the time. 
We go and sit and clerk at the window gets on with it.  Three hours from the moment that we arrived.  Clerk at the window calls me.  This time it is big smiles we have a new file.  They found Jess on the computer and oddly enough her surname is spelled right.   Sadly file with all info is lost but at least we are getting on. 
The universe was a bit kinder after and the blood tests were all there.  Any way the doctors could not find anything conclusive, more tests and we are back to the hospital for another adventure tomorrow. 

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